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I read once that the purpose of abuse (more emotional than physical) sometimes is to keep the ‘victim’ dependent on the abuser. 

My fascination with criminology and cold cases has taught me and shed light on the many intricacies of abuse. The whys and hows of emotional and physical abuse, insight into the abuser’s way of thinking. 

Like with everything else in life, from the outside looking in, it’s always easier to ‘judge’ regardless of how misinformed you are on the matter, pass comments on what ‘you’d have done’ and ‘how stupid’ that person is based on one reason or the other. 

Abuse changes one’s psyche in ways that aren’t fathomable to a rigid and timid mind, and it is because of this that judgment comes easily.

People that have been abused usually don’t speak out because of the ’embarrassment’ and backlash that comes with it. Just to name a few;

1. You wanted it because if you didn’t you wouldn’t have taken it. 

2. What did you do for you to be abused. 

3. Reference to situations that have absolutely nothing to do with the abuse itself. 

Focusing on the above mentioned, ask yourself this, how easy do you think it would be for you to speak out if it happened to you? 

Why is it that we find it easier to emotionally attack those affected rather than deal with the ones responsible for the abuse? This in itself shows how we live in an undeniably flawed society. 

Abuse affects the way one views themself and may trigger depression amongst many other things. Imagine losing sense of who you are though you’ve known yourself your entire life! Then add on the slander and backlash from the same society that advocates for people to speak out. 

Abuse in it’s entirety is something that is difficult to fully understand as each case differs from individual to individual. It is something that is diffucult to accept, not to mention deal with and half the time ‘victims’ live in denial of it, making all kinds of excuses because they just cannot fathom the reality of it all.

Being emotionally &/ physically abused is not something that is easy to get over, for some it takes months and for others a lifetime. It is a struggle on its own, and by knowing this may we never be the ones that make it harder for them to move past it. 

I for one am not a fan of the word ‘victim’. I think people deserve more than to be labeled victims but well. 

Abuse, though we do more often than not, is not something that should be taken lightly neither is it something to laugh about. Let us aspire to be people that are approachable for those that need help with this problem rather than  being the cause of more pain and discomfort. 

There is always a way to overcome it, though it may seem bleak at times. Always believe and trust that you have what it takes to stop the cycle.

❤️Someone, somewhere needs to know and believe this❤️