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***coming from the heart***

There is something about fear that keeps your success at bay, keeps you a step away from goals achieved and leads you astray. Fear of speaking out in a quest to remain neutral but where does that leave me?

I’ve witnessed with my mouth before, things my eyes had not, and that which my eyes had, I said not, now what kind of a person does that make me? It kills me a little to watch my people whither away, entities dissolving into thin air. We rush to promote another breed, another tribe leaving each other fighting over crumbs left by desolate if anything egocentric minds.

We aim and yearn for better and our words support this, but our actions tend to always take us elsewhere. We struggle to give birth to a better version of ourselves and I never seize to wonder why. Is it fear that is keeping our success at bay or is it lack of follow through? Sometimes I wonder if our dreams aren’t big enough of maybe lack thereof.

This isn’t about me but the 60 year old man that begged me to buy USD$1 wooden cooking spoons under the scorching sun, not about me but the 14year old girl that’s just dropped out of school due to lack of fees, far from me but about the man that’s been forced to close down and file for bankruptcy  and has been left with nothing but “I-used-to-be’s”.

One ought to be selfish and put themselves first sometimes I’ve been told, but when it’s been all your life does this still apply? If I were to be selfish for but a moment, where would that leave the one person that depends on me and those that depend on them? A negative ripple effect started by one selfish moment, knowing the outcome, would I be able to look myself in the eye and sleep at night?

Cheap imported knock-offs in place of our own, girls taking it back to the oldest profession known to man, is this meant to take me back to pleasant times? My words aren’t those of a homeless man but my fellow man is so they might as well be. If I were to stand on a hill and boast about that which I have, would that make me a better person in the eyes of the less privileged onlookers or maybe flat out like an alienated fool that has lost sight of where i came from?

Ancient times are long gone and with them the love for one another. I pace about whilst deep in thought about where I, you and I, where We ought to be, but I come up with nothing. I see nothing, but maybe if you take my hand, whilst I take another and they take another, I bet we could see it all.

crying

*April’sLoveChild*

 

 

 

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